Musings and experiences about BDSM and other things decadent

There is an art to play.

We often don’t give it enough credit.  We all put a little art to our play.  A certain flare to a stroke, sliding the rope across a a nipple, a sharp tug to get the sub’s attention–these are the little things we do to make our play more interesting.

But some people are better at it than others.  We know who they are.  They are the ones that mesmerize us when they play.  We stop and watch like an audience watching a magnificent opera.  We keep our eyes glues to each movement like someone watching a great movie. We get drawn in as we watch the Dom and the Sub do their dance.

In fact, the best players are ones that have a theatrical flare.  But it isn’t all about style.  I have watched people play hard.  There was the dom using a flogger that slams the sub against the post holding her.  There was the dom cracking a single tail making and the sub fighting back.  But I have seen a dom caressing a sub with a flogger.  I have seen doms using rope to guide the sub to the right position while blindfolded.  No, it isn’t just about what style to use.

The secret to the art of play is understanding that what we are doing is connecting with someone else.

When we played as children, we were connecting with someone else who was helping us enter our fantasy world.  We had a set of rules–both implicit and explicit–that governed what we did and how our interactions would work.  And we and our play partner(s) interacted in ways that transported us to the playscapes that filled our minds.  And as long as we stayed with the those rules, we became totally immersed in those playscapes.

So now we are playing at a higher level.  But we are still playing.  We still need to abide by rules both explicit and implicit. And we are still connecting.

Now, how do we turn our play into art?

[To be continued]